Magic Gardens: A Cautionary Tale
In which we learn why we should never aspire to be the beanstalk
Out of nowhere, one of the plants in my front yard started growing a stalk, like something out of a fairy tale. Each morning, it was a foot taller, until the stalk reached higher than our gate, then higher than our house.
I made jokes about giants in the sky, and golden harps, and magic beans.
As a child, I was constantly searching for fairy mounds and secret passages, checking the backs of wardrobes, and rubbing old glass bottles in case they contained djinn. I was desperate to find proof that magic existed, and that it had chosen to reveal itself to me.
But when something strangely magical happened in my own front yard, it turned out to be nothing like I’d hoped.
A few weeks after the strange stalk appeared, I googled it, and immediately wished I hadn’t. Because it wasn’t a fairy tale at all. It was a cautionary one.
Apparently, agave plants spend their whole lives getting ready to bloom. They give it everything they have, and then, after producing one perfect flower stalk, they die.
That’s exactly what writing a novel feels like. Or, what being at the end of writing a book feels like.
Except, unlike my miraculous plant, I have to pick myself up and do it again. I have to be a rose bush, blooming frequently, instead of an agave that blooms only once.
Some writers are agave. They know that they have a book inside of them, and eventually, they’ll find the time to write it. But that’s not the type of writer I chose to be. Which is why we’re back here, dear newsletter, once again in book release season. The last bloom didn’t kill me, so I produced another.
THE NEW CAMELOT comes out this month, on the 27th to be exact, and it’s the finale in my kissing in King Arthur’s court trilogy (devastated I didn’t call it that). It’s been quite a journey, and for all of you who came along with me, thank you. You can preorder a signed copy here, from The Ripped Bodice, or from Barnes & Noble or Amazon. There are preorder gifts from my publisher, as well as exclusive gifts from my local indie.
If you’re in Los Angeles, I’d love to celebrate this release with you at Annabelle’s Book Club on August 27, where I’ll be in conversation with the fabulous Hannah Lisa Lohr.
SOME RECENT LOVES
Remember the last time you had mustard? I’m betting it was unremarkable, because, well, it’s a basic, boring condiment. This is what I thought, too. Until I found a tiny pot of honey and balsamic dijon mustard in my pantry, something I’d picked up in French duty free last year, one of many items in a sampler box. I tried it and freaked out. It was incredible.
I immediately took to the internet to see if it was possible to buy more. And it is! On Amazon! For less than $7. Anyway, if you too wish to have your mind blown by seriously good French mustard, you can buy it here.
In my quest to avoid turning into a swamp witch every summer, I stumbled upon these amazing halter neck tank tops from Uniqlo. They’re less than $30, and come with a built-in bra. If you’re a D or smaller, these are incredible! I’ve tried on other built-in bra tops (looking at you, Brami and A&F) which are apparently not for anyone who actually needs to wear a bra, and were huge disappointments. This one’s better. Trust me.
Industry, Seasons 1-3
I’m still not entirely sure what this HBO show’s about, but Season 3 just premiered, and I can’t stop watching. Everyone’s very pretty, and very smart, and incredibly vicious, and keeps making stupid decisions about who to sleep with while trying to succeed in investment banking.
Okay, that’s it from me. What are you loving? What sorts of recommendations would you like to see in this newsletter? Let me know!